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Fun with the Undead

Ethan has decided he's a zombie.  I'm not sure where he's gotten this idea, because we don't have any books, videos, etc. of zombies.  This fun little journey has gone something like this.  It all began with Ethan's prayer last night, and what he was thankful for:

Ethan, gimping along, looking like he pulled something:  Pllllaaaannntttsss....pppllllaaannntts...

Me:  Plants?  Yeah, plants are good.  Thank you God for plants.

Ethan: Plllaaannnnttts....must.....eat....plants....om nom nom....

Me:  Yes, plants can be tasty if they're veggies.

Ethan:  Imma zoooommmbbbiiieee!!!!

Me:  You're a zombie?

Ethan:  ZOMBIE!!!

Me, piecing things together:  Uh, Ethan?  What do zombies eat?

Ethan:  PLANTS!!!

Me:  Um...no.  Zombies eat brains.

Ethan:  No they don't.  They eat plants.  That's icky.

So I had a warm, mother/son talk about the dietary habits of zombies.  I thought that was it.  But, after a restful undead night, my little zombie decided to resume his habits outside as we waited for the bus.  He came up and tried to bite me.

Me:  Stop.  You're making my coat moist.

Ethan: Imma gonna eat you!  NOM NOM!!!

Me:  Uh, no thanks.  (Temporary lapse in judgment--forgetting about autism).  Eat a leaf.

Son proceeds to go and pick up leaf and eat it.  He drools it out.

Me:  NO!!  Just PRETEND!! 

Ethan:  BRAIN!!!  (Tries to eat me again).

Me:  Stop.  I don't want to be eaten.

Ethan stoops down, picks up leaf and tries to eat it again.

Me:  NO!!  (Ethan only has a bit of leaf in his mouth.  He suddenly remembers that leaves are not tasty.)  Just pretend like you're eating it.

At this point, the bus arrives.  So Ethan naturally runs away.  I get him back where he tries to eat the bus.  I explain to the driver that Ethan is a zombie today, and is trying to eat the bus (as if this is the most natural thing in the world).  Ethan gets on the bus, and yes, proceeds to try and eat the driver.

Me:  No!  Leave her alone!

Driver:  Don't eat me.  I need to drive the bus.

Thankfully, Ethan had his Tootsie Pop, so they were able to distract him with ideas of eating THAT.  Ethan gleefully unwraps his sucker and....tries to eat the wrapper.  Good luck Orvis Risner.  He's all yours.

Comments

  1. AmandaDecember 26, 2013 at 3:41 PM

    the boys play zombies too and they don't see anything with zombies at our house. the common factor? bible class! haha

    ReplyDelete

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